Creating confidence
Confidence is all about feeling it baby. It’s about grabbing hold of all that you are and embodying it with the utmost brilliance you can. Are you weird then embrace that shit. It’s all about owning yourself and accepting you, regardless of what anyone else thinks. Like if you want to dye your hair blue then screw it, go out and dye it blue! (Just bought brand mondos hair color in 3 vibrant shades so this will be happening!) You only have one life to live so why hide in that tiny dark room waiting for the day you allow yourself to come out.
When you walk into a room stand as if you belong there. Don’t look down at the floor as your walking, your feet know how to walk, walk with that beautiful head held high. When you look down then you narrow your scope of the world, it also can mean you lack confidence. When you look down it’s as if your saying I am not worthy to make eye contact with you or the world around me. So shine those beautiful eyes up and strut your stuff! If you want to hype yourself up talk to yourself in a mirror. Everyday before you leave your house compliment yourself with at least 5 things. I want you to compliment things you wouldn’t normally say about yourself. Not just your appearance, but you personality. Record yourself doing it too, take pictures, pose, make yourself feel so awkward in that mirror everyday until you start to be like wow, I look good. You are only awkward because you lack that confidence.
Me I have a hard time with people taking pictures of me. I’m critical of my light eyebrows or my left eye looking weird or my legs looking like a chonkfeast. (chonkfeast=something you could survive off of during the next ice age. Yes I make words up.) But today I asked my boyfriend to look at all his photos on his phone because I know he takes a lot of me. I looked at all the awful goofy awkward photos and I stared at them looking for the compliment. There was one photo so bad it looked like I was stung by bees a billion times in the face and another one where I looked awful but instead of sticking with that as the story, I remembered what I was doing in them. I started to see how beautiful I was in them and how animated I am. Not every photo is gold but I started to see the gold in each photo.
Lately I have had this I don’t care what others think of me vibe going on. I can’t fully explain it, I just am just authentically me and it’s amazing. I go into everything thinking just be your goofy self and make them laugh. So every time I get to explain something I let my inner diva goddess come out full of theatrics and enthusiasm. I use to hide that away for so long, my inner goofball. I always needed validation from the outside world telling me Im great I was but it always left me needing more and more from the external resources. Sure I still love that outside validation but I don’t need it anymore. I gained confidence because I slowly learned to love myself fully. I realized my inner badass by working through my emotions and letting go of shit that didn’t serve me.
We tend to lack confidence because all the crap we were taught growing up leaves us in an identity crisis where we are searching for some kind of validation that who we are is amazing. But it isn’t until we finally gain acceptance of what was and separate it from who you are and not take it personally that we get to break free of the chains. (Read the four agreements.) You can’t give away your power by accepting someone else’s opinion of you as fact. What someone says about you is on them. What you say about yourself is what you become. So if you say your stupid or a bitch then you won’t see the truth about yourself. I mean for the longest time I thought people looked at me like I was a bitch. But recently discovered that truth I had about myself was completely wrong. Finding that out and finally seeing the truth was so liberating. I now see myself as this bubbly goofball who is kind and compassionate.
So how can we change our confidence into this badass boss bitch who has an unshakable faith in themself?
1. Fake it till you make it. Like I said compliment yourself everyday on things you don’t like. I don’t like my legs. So tomorrow I am going to stare at them and love on them even harder then. My legs are like marble wrapped in silk, a sexy piece of art. They are leg lamp material with their beautiful calves and their soft skin. Something like this, like I said I am theatrical and animated so this is how I have to talk to myself. Find your inner voice and speak to your own soul.
2. Do something that would help you gain more confidence. Feeling body shame, then maybe look at what your ingesting or maybe how your are exercising. Maybe adding a workout routine will help you love on your body more then shame it for being out of shape. Create the masterpiece you want by taking action to paint it into existence.
3. Ask your friends this question,” If I had a YouTube channel what could you see me doing. Go into detail.” I know it sounds weird but hearing what people think about your talents, skills, personality, is eye opening even if it has criticism. It allows for you to change the things you don’t like and accept the things you do!
4. Super hero pose it bitch! Put your arms on your sides for 5 minutes in the beginning of the day. If possible do it before a big meeting or a test. This pose has actually been proven to help boost confidence and do better on tests or meetings.
5. Meditate. During your meditation ask yourself if you could accept one thing about yourself that you hate what would it be? And how can you turn that hate into love? Don’t focus on getting the answer, just focus on sending out love to whatever it is. Focus on just being present and loving you.
6. Find something you love and embrace it. Pretend like that thing makes you sassier, funnier, more loving, more exciting, more whatever. Then use that uplifting energy and just be you. I love to make people laugh, so I pretend now that everything I say is funny. (Even if it isn’t. I want to make people feel safe and laugh around me, so I try to amplify my energy to that of humorous and laughter and light.)
Find a reason to love yourself every single moment of every single day. You should be the reason your happy, that you succeed, that you have reason, not anyone else. Sure other people are great for motivation, advice, energy swapping but you are in complete control of your reality and your life. So like I said invest your time and energy into loving who you are so completely that nothing will ever make you doubt that shit. You are an amazing, brilliant ray of sunshine in this universe. Everyday you are alive is an amazing gift and I hope you cherish yourself even when it seems the clouds spread through your sky. Be confident and be in love with you my friend.
Today was a 10.