When one door closes…
So I found out some shitty news today. My landlord decided that he isn’t going to renew my lease for my apartment. Now for anyone interested in this I have moved 6 times in the past 3 years. I moved around a lot after my first ex. To buffalo and then back. I haven’t really ever felt at home anywhere, a wandering gypsy until I moved to the hanger. When I moved in it felt familiar and I was nervous about being out of the city but I fell in love with it.
For the past almost year I have lived in a beautiful, quiet, serene space where I can see the crystal clear stars at night. A place that my dog can run, and has made friends with the local ponies, his horse friends and now it looks as if I have to leave. I’ve gotten to meet the local pilots around here and started work at the cafe. It became home for me for the first time in a very long time and now I have to thank the city folks who are migrating upstate towards me for this. I’m a little disappointed and angry because I have to give up the home I built here with Nick.
So here I am now working on finding a new place to move to, disappointed that I have to pack up everything again and re-settle into something different. It’s like if you went from driving a Bentley and now you have to start the search for a car that is comparable to that sweet ass ride. I know what I require and need in my next place but to find it, we shall see. I feel like I got hit in the face with this news but I also knew it was coming. I just felt it coming, and still I couldn’t get past the bomb he dropped.
From here on out I will be manifesting something amazing. I know that my future is bright and I have limitless potential. September is my month and I know and feel in my very being that great, amazing things are going to happen. So as this door closes, this door that showed me how to let go, it gave me peace to transform, to open up, a new door is going to open for the next chapter in my life. I am so beyond grateful for what this place meant to me and what I learned here. This home showed me who I am, it’s where I found myself and had the distance from a pandemic to do it. I got to know myself here and truly let go of some really difficult things. I am ready to embrace what happens and excited for the future. I know that with Nick by my side the sky is the limit, and even though I won’t be in this hanger anymore I am going to still be soaring high.
Today was a 7.